A New Life

We all know what today is. We all remember four years ago today. But something has changed this year. Although the pain of losing Dan is as strong today as it was four years ago, today we are beginning to celebrate his life. We have so many wonderful memories of him. Tricia and I made a conscious decision to make this year different. Starting today we are going to focus on the good changes we made and Dan made in our lives.

Dan really didn't care for the Christmas season after the year of his fathers accident. As a matter of fact, he almost hated it. He grew extremely depressed at the holidays. His feelings of guilt for not being able to be there to help his family and his father seemed to sometimes consume him. Slowly, over the years, we were able to show him that there were other good things to remember at Christmas... like what it was really about!

The start of it ironically came at a time when Dan had been laid off of work the day before Thanksgiving. I really thought that was going to be a year he was going to succumb to the depression badly. I sat him down and asked him to try something different that year. We were going to focus on making the holiday about the kids and the true meaning of Christmas. The kids got up on the morning of Thanksgiving and began our routine of preparing the meal. We all had special jobs to do, as in our house, everyone was involved in the meal prep, just like the Pilgrims and Indians. However, on this day, I was the Chief in the kitchen. (Dan usually was as he loved to cook.)

We enjoyed our parades and meal, but then something different happened. Instead of Dan watching football, he disappeared out into the garage. Pretty soon he was calling the girls out to help him. Dan was getting out all the outdoor Christmas decorations! That year, as you can ask the girls, was one they will never forget. Dan made it through the season, still a little down, but determined to move forward.

Whenever our family wanted to have great family time and just "put away" the troubles we may have been going through, we would go to Disney World. It was just a short drive and we had annual passes, so it was easy. We would go to the Osborne Light Show and see all the lights and decorations. Disney would have an annual pass holders night and we would go to it, enjoying the cookies, music, lights and Disney snow!

So today, we are going to move forward in a new way. Our friend Josh has invited us to Disney World again. He is getting us in and helping us to enjoy and remember. We are going to moved forward and change to a positive mood for the holidays. Are we going to forget what today is? Absolutely not! But because of what today is, we are going to remember Dan happy, follow his lead to move out of the depression, and get back to living. I'm sure there will still be tears, but hopefully they will be more happy tears than sad. Dan really wanted to go see the Mickey's Very Merry Christmas Party and planned to do so before he got sick. So tonight...we're going! And we will enjoy it for you Dan! We know you will be with us.

Check back with us tomorrow because we will post pictures as our gift to Dan for his birthday!

We love and miss you constantly Dan!